Monday, August 30, 2010

a spiritual place

the other morning.. a cold chilly morning as has been the norm lately..
still in bed, with the blankets pulled up to our chins to keep the cold out...dutch husband & I were talking about the spirit of our home[s]..
this one, Villa Maria
as well as Inglewood.

now, dutch husband doesn't usually say much about his spiritual journey but he casually mentioned that he didn't think that Villa Maria had the soul that Inglewood did.. I immediately jumped to our new home's defence but also agreed that i felt as if there was an uneasy energy in our new home.. and he asked if I could 'do something' to move it on.. yes.. i can. I know I must sage our new home and sing to it.. but it is hard to do with the energies coming in and out at the moment.. i think the energy that is here is maybe that of the former owner.. kind of like a finger print left over.. residue..

as we talked in the early morning light, we both mentioned the spirits in the house known as Inglewood and how we often saw, in the corner of our eyes, flashes of someone.. dressed in white.. known to us as Gladys


we have both seen flashes of something in our garden here at Villa Maria.. an ancient energy. like something is watching us from afar.. not threatening at all, curious maybe..
then I remember reading somewhere, that this land that Villa Maria is on was once an aboriginal watering place. our home is situated in a kind of a gully.. which leads towards a stream and spring..

the area has been written about by Eugene Stockton, a catholic priest who is now a hermit. the catholic church is very close too and there are many shrines and grotto's, dotted throughout the bush area where the Nuns and priests use to say the Stations of the Cross or go to sit and contemplate.. so all in all a very sacred area to live.

while searching for information about my area, on the net, I came upon these words.. synchronicity, I think, because it is as if the ancient ones are speaking to me in these words:

We know that our white brothers and sisters carry their own particular burdens.
We believe that if they let us come to them, if they open up their minds and
hearts to us, we may lighten their burdens. There is a struggle for us, but we
have not lost our spirit of Dadirri.
There are deep springs within each of us. Within this deep spring, which is the
very spirit, is a sound. The sound of Deep calling to Deep. The time for rebirth
is now.
Edited version adapted from the writings of Miriam Rose Ungenmerr

[lunch is taken under the rhododendron tree - a lovely shady nook]

so what have we done here at Villa Maria?
a long list of things...
my kitchen bench and sink are in,

we have put up a new front fence

[Brian, the fencer. an Irishman with the most divine accent, I could listen to it all day]

& painted it 'swiss mocha'

dutch husband has erected a garden shed for me. He is also in the process of erecting some privacy screens around the yard to create a courtyard for me.. this is the beginning of my italian 'look'...

we have planted olive trees along the front footpath & sedums along the fence. I want to add some lavender as well. I have planted ivy geraniums in pots and sage, parsley & coriander in the herb garden... still alot to do but it is beginning to take shape.. beginning to look like the Italian Villa I have in my imagination..

Friday, August 20, 2010

working through & about Woodford

Inglewood seems to be missed by many..
but I will say that i absolutely am 100% ok with moving, I haven't missed Inglewood at all. I adore Villa Maria even though I feel scattered and displaced.
so just why did we move?

since moving here to Villa Maria and my past few posts of how i am feeling.. many have asked why we moved. A number of reasons, I guess...

i think it all came to fruition, with the break up of my son's marriage.. not sure why, but something went from Inglewood for both of us.

the house & garden was getting too big for us really.. our children have left home except for Sophie who is not there much anyhow.. and the climate in Springwood is much milder during winter..
alot of small reasons added up to moving. I am really happy and ok with moving, it is just adjusting to it all I guess.. apparently, my feelings are very normal

so about Woodford
Woodford is the town where Inglewood is..
I love the village. it is small with no shop except a post office. Woodford is a sleepy little place with a major highway cutting it into two [and more roads being built at the moment].
The climate is cold but it doesn't snow.. although it has been known to have falls of snow every ten years or so. At Woodford you are isolated, there isn't a sense of community.. I was very solitary at Woodford, I had friends yes, but had to drive to see them. I had to drive to buy milk or bread. there are no walking footpaths in Woodford, to walk, I had to drive somewhere and park my car. If you walk in Woodford, you take your life into your own hands, so it is safer not to. But I do love Woodford, it is a fantastic place to bring children up in. There is a real magick about Woodford, but it was seemingly disappearing with the road works that is happening at the moment, like the testosterone tonka toys [being driven by men who haven't grown up] - knocking down trees, blasting rocks... they are disturbing the magick, the nature spirits and bringing in a very uneasy energy. I felt that. my head & soul felt it and it mad me very sad. so it was good to move. I totally 100% know that.....and you know, just last night, while sitting at our local bowling club having dinner [still no stove].. dutch husband sat back, sipping his red wine, and sighed.. saying 'isn't this just fantastic living in Springwood'... and that said it all for me.

Monday, August 16, 2010

it's all happening

living at Villa Maria, hasn't been all bad. I do love living here, unfortunately this winter has been very cold and the lack of heating has played havoc with my bones..
I have been walking alot with dutch husband or by myself and pottering in the garden as i have been able.

the kitchen benchtop is in & our sink was connected a week ago. Shower screen was installed the same week and our home has been busy with tradesmen measuring up for various jobs. Windows have been ordered and will be installed in a month, fence is coming next week as is air-conditioning [which will be good to heat until our gas is installed] - the gas is being connected to the house from the street tomorrow and then we just have to wait for the heater to be installed.. .. both Joe & I have been very busy, often going to bed around 9pm.

I spen some of the weekend unpacking some more boxes and I think this week should see it all done.
the lost feeling hovers.. .. ebbing and flowing like the ocean tide - with me trying hard to go with it, to see what this feeling is offering me..

I went for a walk one morning early, just after we had moved in & these notes below are from my journal [the only time I have written in my journal since i moved in]

"went for an early morning walk, it rained overnight and the air was crisp, making my breath come out in little clouds of mist. I felt at peace knowing that I was still going to experience the seasons even if not as marked as they are in Woodford.
I noticed elderberry growing like a weed, bare branches of winter trees along side the budding branches in anticipation of spring, even if still a time away
I smelled daphne as I walked past, noting to self that it does grow here in Springwood. I saw smoke coming from someone's chimney. there were free oranges, lemons & grapefruit just outside someone's gate - free for the taking.
I think we have done the right thing in moving, even if there is apprehension in my soul. I know it will be good for both Joe & I..."

Friday, August 13, 2010

the first family memory at Villa Maria.. & how I am

sitting here, reading comments as they come in.. some wondering how i am doing, i have forced myself to sit and post..
I am not doing that well. I have a deep sadness or melancholy around me at the moment. Like I am displaced. I feel as if I don't belong. that I am scattered.
I don't regret for one minute moving from Inglewood. I still love Villa Maria.. but I feel as if I am out of body.
I have not meditated since I moved in or journaled. I know I must, but I can't. I haven't even lit candles on my altar.. something I did religiously every single day when I lived in Woodford.

we live in chaos.

no stove or heating except for small column heaters that dot the house. we are waiting on natural gas to be connected and our stove is coming from England and won't be here til September. Eating out has become a chore. I crave for a home cooked meal.. that is easy to prepare.. yes, I am cooking sometimes in the slow cooker.. but have no facility to boil rice or steam vegies.

small peanuts compared to some others in the world. but this is my world.. and right now, i feel lost and displaced. scattered. I am tired of putting on a happy face for everyone.. when all I want to do is sob. but I can't sob, because then people will think I regret moving and I don't. no. I just cannot put my finger on this.....

our first family memory was made at Villa Maria last weekend, with the celebration of our youngest daughters 21st..
[her birthday 'cake' was a tower of cup cakes or patty cakes as we call them here]
a lovely champagne brunch with friends and family at the Ori cafe, a favourite of ours. Sophie has now gone on a weeks holiday to Queensland and then is off to Holland in September for 10 days. she has growing up so fast, [it is like just yesterday that I woke to see her little head ensconced in a very brightly striped beanie..] and I think this also contributes to my melancholy..

so many changes in such a short time..

what else?.. dutch husband and I have booked ourselves a short break away to Uluru and the Olgas .. sacred places of our indigenous people. i am so looking forward to this.. and we are in the beginning stages of organising a trip to America next year to ride part of route 66

Tuesday, August 3, 2010


I am back online. but first of all, I must visit my friends & their blogs.. then I can sit and tell all about the move... how I said farewell to Inglewood and how I have been settling into Villa Maria
"She seemed to come suddenly upon happiness as if she had surprised a butterfly in the Winter woods"
(edith wharton)